Chano.cR Posted February 26, 2008 Report Posted February 26, 2008 (edited) Well worth the read...If you've raided in ANY MMO the majority of these apply. So the real question, who are you? You raid with these people. You work with these people. These people are closer than your family. You should worry. The GM- He's sacrificed his health, friends, and probably a couple of jobs to drag you through new content. When the guild isn't performing, these decisions are in question. Prone to shooting sprees, forum flame wars, and the rapid advancement/gearing of whatever toon the guild "needs". If you can keep your mouth shut, he'll go emo and quit before you get gkicked. Still, you do like the guy. Or did. Before he went crazy. See drunks, below. The GM's Significant Other- Okay, so he was going to have to quit but he tricked his SO into playing. She loves it. She's terrible. You'll effectively 24 man every boss. Count on 4 constructs in the raid, every attempt. She plays a Belf. The Raid Leader- When you stand in the flames, he dies a little bit inside. The Heir Apparent- When the GM goes psycho, ninjas the bank, and gdisbands, you're the guy the guild is gonna look to to to fix the mess. You see it coming. You can't decide if ritual suicide or being the new gm would be more painful. The Positive Officer- "That was great. Just great. You know, only 5% of guilds have even made it to Supremus, and getting him down to 67% on the second attempt is hawt." See Stoners, below. The Negative Officer- "Jesus Christ why are there corpses under all these goddamn volcanoes? It's Supremus for %@*@s's sake. GET OUT OF THE GODDAMN FLAME!" See Drunks, below. The Healing Officer- Has this job because, as the newest officer who plays a healer, he's stuck with it. The Hunter Class Lead- Will tell you that it does actually require skill and preparation to play a hunter well in the end game. Lies frequently. Metermaid- He's got meters running. Always. Asks for meter postage whenever he's in the top 5, which is rare, as his focus on the meters is preventing him from seeing the volcano he's pathing towards. Pulls aggro. Has yet to realize that 0 health returns 0 dps. If he's healing, you might as well just put him on raid, he's gonna heal them anyway. Stratman- Has read every strategy on the entire internet for every boss. Unable to think critically. Knows where his talk key is. Hated by the officers. Likely to play a hunter or mage. If this is also Chick With Accent, below, guild will probably collapse. The Gay Guy- Affects the gay accent for effect. Upgrade decisions tend to involve lengthy discussions about gear appearance. Learned to use the dressing room function before the 'v'key. The Stay At Home Mom- She's around children all day and craves adult conversation. Babbles incessantly in vent, forgetting that adult conversation doesn't usually begin with, "So I was talking to (insert name of four-year-old child) and he says…" Well liked, but frequently muted. Mr. Mikeless- Has a microphone. Hears the conversation and directions. Once wiped the raid because he started talking and most folks alt-tabbed to see who the hell was speaking. May be your best player. The Kid- So, you messed up on this guy's interview and nobody noticed that he was 12. But, he can play. And if he gets a little bit excited when boobies are getting talked about? Hey, he's young. The Backbone- Plays a tank. Doesn't have much to say. Made an error once in SSC, or so you heard. Will disconnect when Gorefiend is at 30% and keep aggro while offline for the rest of the fight. Has never said anything negative to the healers. Ever. GL with your progression without one of these. Hates the prima donnas. The Other kid- Remember that accountant you interviewed for the fury warrior position? And how you wondered how he'd make time to raid during tax season? He couldn't. His eleven year old daughter took over about that time. She's been raiding since. Mages, that's an eleven year-old girl owning you night after night. The Hunter Who Doesn't Do His Homework- Always good for insightful commentary and clever observation just after a wipe. "Holy Crap Man! I was just standing and shooting and this damn VOLCANO popped on me! When did they put in those volcanoes?" The Prophet- Kept insisting that you were going to need a melee group for BT, despite the fact hat melee was dreadful for SSC/BT. Badgered the management until they broke. Plays a rogue. Shreds. Loved by the Most Devout. The Most Devout- This is the guy who gets to play an off-spec in a big-boy raid. He's the fury warrior or the enhance shammy. He cannot believe that some fate is letting him have this much fun that he's afraid it will all come crashing down. Prays devoutly to his favorite diety that the guild won't collapse because he'll never have THIS much fun again. Ever. The Drunks- The core of your guild. As raid progresses, their voices in vent are getting just ever so slightly slurred. You don't notice because you're trying to sound sober yourself. DPS output seems to scale positively with blood alcohol content. The Stoners- Quietly wiping raids since the beta. They really, really, really hate having to move out of the fire. Two of them are dead under the volcanoes. They live in fear of the negative officer. They have their own channel. Try /join (insertguildname)stoners. You'll see who's in there. It'll explain a lot. Still, if these guys don't show, bosses don't seem to actually die. They're also having more fun that everyone else combined. The Prima Donna- Requires special attention from management. Constantly whining. Plays some vital role. Might be a main tank, mage tank, or lock tank. The officers really hate this guy and as soon as they can find another tank with 24,000 buffed HP, he's out. Not a stoner. The Chick with the Accent- Is the accent fake? Nobody knows or cares. Future visits to Australia/Britian/New Zealand/Alabama are now planned by all single raid members. The Healing Pallie- Hates healing and had to go holy to see endgame. If you raid with a boomkin, a feral druid, a fury warrior, or any non-resto shaman, you are not getting a 10 minute blessing. Forget it. He hates you. God help you if he has a raid-viable alt in one of those classes; you're not even getting heals. Also, see Prima Donna. The Departed Legend- You joined after he left. You suspect that he could not actually solo Doomwalker. But you're not totally sure. The Disgruntled Raider- Took an unannounced, extended vacation and now has to share his raid spot with the other 11 extra dps. Very angry about this situation. Doesn't realize that ##@#*ing is making things worse. Officers pray for a gquit. The Warlock Whisperer- Directionally challenged. Despite having run Karazhan 1.26 million times, will require a summon to Maiden's room from the entrance. Has a "summon pls" macro. Strangely, is good at moving away from volcanoes. See (you guessed it) Stoners. The New Guy- Begins most sentences with, "That's not how we did it in my old guild on Korgath." Likely to remain guilded for approximately one week. You wonder if he'll be tellign his next guild, "In my old guild, we ran TOWARDS the volcanoes. The Backup-He's the guy waiting in the wings for the raid slot. Totally dependable and plays about 200% better than the guy for whom he's filling in. He's got half the gear and puts out 20% more dps. Totally cool, amazingly competent. You love it when the main can't be there. The Buff-less Wonder - Plays a class with group buffs, but "forgets" to bring the necessary reagents. Highly skilled at turning a deaf ear and blind eye to buff assignments. If reminded, will proceed to slowly buff people one by one until someone else is overwhelmed by frustration and does it for them. Mr. Pick Me! Pick Me!- This guy is online and ready to raid. Always. Need a prot warrior? He's got one. A holy pallie? Check. Problem is, he's really bad. Like bad bad. You keep him in the guild because he's... well, he's always been in the guild. So when your main tank, back up tank, and back up back up tank have vanished Mr. Pick is ready to rock, much to everyone else's horror. Tootsie - Has a female toon. Claims to be female. Receives many of the benefits that the other females do, people are nice to her; she gets suspiciously good loot. Problem is, she's never posted a picture of herself, and she never talks on Vent. Could she really be a girl? Sure. But who's to know? The Dumbest Person On The Planet: No one's quite sure exactly what's wrong with this guy, perhaps human evolution really has come to a standstill. Will be the cause of 60% of your wipes until he gets a /gkick. Tell him to spread out and he'll glue himself to a squishy healer. Tell him to avoid something and he'll stand in it till dead, then complain that he didn't get any heals. Ask him to CC the yellow star and he'll pick the orange circle then claim bleeding wounds debuff on his target. The Obvious Explainer - This guy has read Wowwiki and probably written some of it. He will stop the raid for 15 minutes before each fight to explain to all the new people (of which there are none) that this guy might produce ground fire once in a while or that the hunter adds might shoot arrows. He'll warn that the boss can hit hard, tell everyone to avoid damage, and remind the healers that they need to keep the tanks alive. It makes you a bit worried that an obviously intelligent person thinks you need spoonfeeding. SOURCE: forums.worldofwarcraft.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ YO = Metermaid He's got meters running. Always. Asks for meter postage whenever he's in the top 5, which is rare, as his focus on the meters is preventing him from seeing the volcano he's pathing towards. Pulls aggro. Has yet to realize that 0 health returns 0 dps. If he's healing, you might as well just put him on raid, he's gonna heal them anyway. Edited February 26, 2008 by Chano.cR
b52¦Morales Posted February 26, 2008 Report Posted February 26, 2008 The Disgruntled Raider- Took an unannounced, extended vacation and now has to share his raid spot with the other 11 extra dps. Very angry about this situation. Doesn't realize that ##@#*ing is making things worse. Officers pray for a gquit. 1year afk, i feel so left behind :´( The Warlock Whisperer- Directionally challenged. Despite having run Karazhan 1.26 million times, will require a summon to Maiden's room from the entrance. Has a "summon pls" macro. Strangely, is good at moving away from volcanoes. See (you guessed it) Stoners. Siempre he tenido serios problemas de orientacion, se acuerdan cuanto tuve que ir a Badlands? --> kek
Link-16 Posted February 26, 2008 Report Posted February 26, 2008 (edited) mae tica deja q decir q sos otro usted es este claramente Tootsie - Has a female toon. Claims to be female. Receives many of the benefits that the other females do, people are nice to her; she gets suspiciously good loot. Problem is, she's never posted a picture of herself, and she never talks on Vent. Could she really be a girl? Sure. But who's to know? Edited February 26, 2008 by Link-16
Chano.cR Posted February 26, 2008 Author Report Posted February 26, 2008 mae tica deja q decir q sos otro usted es este claramente Tootsie - Has a female toon. Claims to be female. Receives many of the benefits that the other females do, people are nice to her; she gets suspiciously good loot. Problem is, she's never posted a picture of herself, and she never talks on Vent. Could she really be a girl? Sure. But who's to know? No estoy diciendo que no soy Tootsie. Este post yo lo puse antes de que ud hiciera el reply en los foros de Horsemen. Pero bueno, Yo tengo un presentimiento que Papa esta ENAMORADA de Ticalia!!!
MidNight Posted February 26, 2008 Report Posted February 26, 2008 Tootsie - Has a female toon. Claims to be female. Receives many of the benefits that the other females do, people are nice to her; she gets suspiciously good loot. Problem is, she's never posted a picture of herself, and she never talks on Vent. Could she really be a girl? Sure. But who's to know? Eso me suena a Geisha
Kaos Posted February 27, 2008 Report Posted February 27, 2008 quién es Geisha? The Hunter Who Doesn't Do His Homework- Always good for insightful commentary and clever observation just after a wipe. "Holy Crap Man! I was just standing and shooting and this damn VOLCANO popped on me! When did they put in those volcanoes?" seems familiar...
Chano.cR Posted February 27, 2008 Author Report Posted February 27, 2008 Eso me suena a Geisha ROFL Si...
[Executor] Posted February 28, 2008 Report Posted February 28, 2008 The Backup-He's the guy waiting in the wings for the raid slot. Totally dependable and plays about 200% better than the guy for whom he's filling in. He's got half the gear and puts out 20% more dps. Totally cool, amazingly competent. You love it when the main can't be there. <---
Metallan Posted February 28, 2008 Report Posted February 28, 2008 (edited) Que va... son muchos... Particularmenre me gusta: The Raid Leader- When you stand in the flames, he dies a little bit inside. Edited February 28, 2008 by Metallan
.:GoD:.Cerberus Posted February 28, 2008 Report Posted February 28, 2008 di cuando realmente raideaba yo diría que era: Mr. Mikeless- Has a microphone. Hears the conversation and directions. Once wiped the raid because he started talking and most folks alt-tabbed to see who the hell was speaking. May be your best player. Y si... después de un año de jugar con MnM cuando compre un mic wipie un raid porque solo como cuatro personas conocían como hablaba para los que se acuerdan de Caen creo que ese mae caia en la categoria de: The Departed Legend- You joined after he left. You suspect that he could not actually solo Doomwalker. But you're not totally sure. dicen las leyendas que el soleo molten core una vez después de una discusión con Anujit (raid leader de bloodsworm en sus buenos tiempos)...
MalkavX Posted February 28, 2008 Report Posted February 28, 2008 The loot !!*@*- The guy always saying NOO! one more try after 10 wipes, I need this bosses gear, I mean we need the gear to progress. He is always shoting the breifs and flirting with an officer to try to get his way, No body likes him but sadly hes actually good. The karaoke rockstar- The guy with the weird voice that half the people beg him to sing his number from alladan while the other half ot the raid scream for him not to and threaten to mute. He sings as well as chirstmas with hung but its so funny no one cares The @ss clown- Always spacing out and makign a joke of every thing. Don't be surpised if he talks on vent durning the gruul fight to talk about a spider bite giving him urinary problems. Hes random as hell and can wipe the raids cordnation clean when every one on vent is laughing so hard. Every loves him cause hes fun but elitists hate him The china farmer- Hes in your guild but no one knows who he is or whos friend he is. He never talks in guild chat and you caught him saying ni hao in trade chat. Hes probably just farming epics on the account only to gquit and sell the character 2 months later when he completes his set The ebayer - The noob of your raid at its finest, when you ask him what spec he is he replies in amazement that he just found out his class his a skill called spec. He constantly asks guild chat for help that level 8's can answer. He doesnt know what Stormwind is and can't figure out why mobs are attacking him. He spends most of his time wondering why there are so many people around that he cant durning raids rather than killing the monster every one is attacking. The guild senior- possibly as old as the flint stones, constantly remind you of what peopledid before computers and how they had to level their characters 20 miles up hills both ways. They strike fear into the hearts of the little kids that go on the internet to talk about booies, they are old, wise and one of your most loyal memebers until the disappear out of no where. The Plugger- Wiped twice on prince, hes offline. only 3 capping a pug in a premade, hes offline again. This guy can't stay online for more than 10 mins without disconnecting you wonder if he has dial up until he stays online all night ot get a raid spot in tk for void reavers shoulders. The clacker- Usally the rogue in your raid spamming sinister strike, when he holds his talk button on vent you hear the bashing of keys on the key board. Sometimes you wonder if theres a fan in the background making that noise because its ALWAYS on even if hes making soup. The demoralizer- The guy in a rival guild thats always on vent with you and in your raid just keeping tabs on your raid always reminding everyone of how bad they are doing because his guild does it faster and better. Every one hates him and only few have the balls to tell him to leave. Too bad hes an officers friend because he always comes back. The raid beyouch- The guy who in the middle of TK he says over and over again about 5 times that he has to leave becuase his girl firend is waiting for him yet the raid leader ignores him and continues to say on vent "OK DPS keep it up". When he finally leaves the raid group the raid leader finally acknowleges him and SAYS "SCREW HER, GIVE HERE A %@@%ING MAGAZINE TO READ". He always caves and rejoins the group. The Fall Guy- The guy who has the unfortuneate luck of talking just as a wipe starts. He takes the abuse of all the officers and ninja loot problems. The one time he goes afk he pulls a pat, wipes the raid, gets raid kicked and makes a new afk policy even though many others afk all the time. The damage or healing meter is alawys reset if he does well and is posted if he does bad. Hes a nice guy but every one needs a scape goat The vent dj- The guy who when he presses the talk button is completely drown out by the blasting music playing the the background thats louder than him. Its alawys a diffrent song but it least you raid to a decent sound track. The emo kid- Usally a rogue litterly dieing for loot. After every boss he slits his wrist for every piece of loot that drops thats not meant for him. If no rogue loot drops by the end of the run he will be dead. Most raid memebrs try to convince him that he is useful and has a meaning in his life, getting every one else paht lootz. The auction master- always going afk to check his auctions on his alts, he constantly tries to sell over priced items to guildies durning the raid. Motivated by greed and wealth he strives to achive his goal of being richer than every one else in your raid combine. You need an enchant? hes got the mats for twice what their worth. You know he plays a mage because he'll never give out a drop water unless its worth his time. When the raids done you have to pay him for a port back to shat. The live wire- The guy whos spazzing out on vent talking 45 words per minute even when its The Guitar Hero AFKer Usually a warlock, he sits back behind the fight and will occasionally cast a DOT or lob a lazy shadowbolt into the fray to keep himself on the DPS meter. He doesn't have to do a lot to get on the meter - he's still a lock. Just enough to outdo the new guildies' DPS, yet not so much that he can't beat Dragonforce on the highest difficulty. Munchies No matter what time of day, even right after he was AFK for dinner, every time this player opens vent you hear a bag of chips ruffling or the crunching of food. Usually draws a bit of focus away from the raid because everyone is trying not to think of how disgusting their computer keyboard must be. Barrens Chat Master He is the mastermind behind the mindless brainwashing spam of the barrens, the [Nicker], stormwind murloc spam, and most recently [blinkstrike]. He knows the life story of Mr. Chuck Norris, as well as every single joke or humorous phrase relating to the martial artist, and can even create a life-like image of Chuck Norris doing a roundhouse kick with text.
didnt get it so i lost QQ Posted March 1, 2008 Report Posted March 1, 2008 The Guitar Hero AFKer Usually a warlock, he sits back behind the fight and will occasionally cast a DOT or lob a lazy shadowbolt into the fray to keep himself on the DPS meter. He doesn't have to do a lot to get on the meter - he's still a lock. Just enough to outdo the new guildies' DPS, yet not so much that he can't beat Dragonforce on the highest difficulty. Munchies No matter what time of day, even right after he was AFK for dinner, every time this player opens vent you hear a bag of chips ruffling or the crunching of food. Usually draws a bit of focus away from the raid because everyone is trying not to think of how disgusting their computer keyboard must be. Que buenos esos dos
K' Posted March 2, 2008 Report Posted March 2, 2008 The Chick with the Accent- Is the accent fake? Nobody knows or cares. Future visits to Australia/Britian/New Zealand/Alabama are now planned by all single raid members. O al menos ese quedo en The Horsemen.
Kaos Posted March 2, 2008 Report Posted March 2, 2008 jaja. Alabama. Esa gente legítimo no hablan inglés. Tienen su propia lengua nativa.
Chano.cR Posted March 2, 2008 Author Report Posted March 2, 2008 The Chick with the Accent- Is the accent fake? Nobody knows or cares. Future visits to Australia/Britian/New Zealand/Alabama are now planned by all single raid members. O al menos ese quedo en The Horsemen. #####US!!!
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